How To Stop Being Afraid of Change
“Time isn’t the enemy. Fear of change is, accept that nothing lasts forever and you’ll start to appreciate the advantages of whatever age you are now.” — Oprah Winfrey
Change is going to happen whether you want it to or not. Whether it is good or bad it is constant.
People change.
Situations change.
Jobs change.
Relationships change.
Change is all around us and cannot be stopped.
How many of you have been at work and the company makes a big announcement about something like layoffs?
What was your initial reaction? I bet you it was fear which is totally normal. You probably went into panic mode thinking all kinds of things. Like how am I going to live or feed my family if I get laid off? Do I have enough money saved just in case?
You start planning out how you are going to survive if the layoff happens to you. I know because I have been there a few times. I know I envisioned scenarios where I took out and lived on my 401K.
Change means having to leave your comfort zone and that is scary for most of us.
Most of the time the fear is not based on the change but how you interpret it. How is this going to directly affect me?
Based on your personality and past experiences this can terrify and even cripple you from taking action. You spend so much time worrying and imagining doomsday scenarios you freeze up.
Let me ask you when you are in this panic mode and imagine doom how many times has the image in your head play out? I going to venture a guess and say close to ZERO.
Most people fear change and always imagine the worst.
Fear is all mental.
This fear brings anxiety and stress which wreaks havoc on the body. Feelings of self-doubt, guilt and worthlessness accompany your fear.
Anxiety and Fear of Change Partner Up
Feeling anxious about a situation that is changing can be caused by fear of the unknown. Everybody wants to be in the know and feel safe. But that is not always possible.
Fear of change causes anxiety and makes most people indecisive. They can’t think straight; their thoughts are muddled and confusion sets in.
Anxiety can lead to developing medical conditions, change of personality and emotional issues.
Methods to Combat Fear
Good news. There are steps you can take to stop these fears from taking over your life.
1. Imagining a positive outcome — Most people believe any change is going to be negative and most of the time they are wrong. They often dream up the worst possible scenario which does not ever play out the way they thought in their head. Studies have shown that positive thinking broadens your sense of possibility and opens your mind up to more options. This allows you to build new skills and resources that provide value. Whatever change is happening is much worse in your head than in real life.
2. Accept uncertainty — Uncertainty is part of life and there is no getting around it. But if you accept it the easier it will be to cope with change. Embrace the lack of control and focus on the fact that you can control how you see the situation.
3. Embracing risk — If you spend your life playing it safe you are missing out on possibilities of what could be. Some risks like going after a new job that you want or ending a bad habit like smoking is worth taking. Playing it safe all the time will provide a safe secure feeling that you are doing the correct thing. But if you don’t introduce some risk into your life you will be missing out on potential life changing decisions.
4. Focus on certainty — Everyone has things in their lives that they can count on. Parents, best friend, strong will, belief in yourself. Lean on these certainties to help you through whatever changes come your way. You know no matter what happens you can always count on them. Everyone goes through periods of change and will always need their anchor.
5. Welcome vulnerability — When you are vulnerable, you have protected yourself against fear of change. It is letting go of perfection and accepting the situation. Deep down you know vulnerability is not going to defeat you. Once you have this mindset the fear does not seem as scary anymore and much more manageable.
I have had a number of changes happen to me and yes, they were scary. But I knew in my head that I was going to get through it and the change would not last forever. I was also aware that the changes that happened were out of my control. I could not stop them but I could control how I dealt with them. These days through my experiences I look forward to change and welcome it. If I could learn how to handle change and roll with it, then so can you.
I believe everyone has the ability to master and conquer their own fear of change. I would love a world where nobody feared change. Imagine the possibilities where all of us conquered this fear took action and did not freeze up or let it paralyze us.
Victory would be ours.
